The Wave

“Everybody used to do that. . . . My father waved.”

Jay Simpson, Resident waver from Hooper, Utah

Jay Simpson giving a wave.

Jay Simpson of Hooper, Utah (population 5,660) has a fun hobby. He gets plenty of exercise, makes lots of friends, and even gets his picture in the paper. Mr. Simpson’s hobby? Waving.

Okay, I know what you’re thinking: “Waving isn’t a hobby.” The way Mr. Simpson does it is. He walks four to five miles each morning, waving to everyone he sees.

Mr. Simpson has always been a waver, but he took it to the next level after his retirement in 1989. And this isn’t just a hometown hobby. When Mr. Simpson and his wife visited England for four months, he waved to the people there. Eventually, they waved back.

Back home, Mr. Simpson is a bit of a celebrity. Folks stop to chat or to snap his photo, and he’s even gotten fan mail.

So if you’re looking for a fun hobby, you might try your hand at waving. It doesn’t cost a dime, and the goodwill you get in return is priceless.

Read more → JaNae Francis, Hooper man offers many a wave and a smile, Standard-Examiner, March 27, 2012. (Photo by Matthew Arden Hatfield/Standard-Examiner)

Bump in the Night

“I’ve run out of ways to say I don’t know.”

Steve Dutch, Wisconsin geologist

Photo by Sherlock Holmes Museum

Who doesn’t love a good mystery? Well, maybe not the people living in Clintonville, Wisconsin (population 4,243) who have been shaken from their slumber recently by bumps in the night. And not the geologist who’s investigating their case. Definitely not the geologist.

Last week, residents of Clintonville were rattled awake three nights in a row by booming noises and shuddering earth. More than 600 called the police to find out what was happening. But the police didn’t know.

City officials looked into it and ruled out military activity and underground methane. They called in Steve Dutch, Wisconsin geologist, to investigate. He said the booms could be caused by a lot of things: subsurface granite cracking, groundwater movement, thermal expansion of pipes, or maybe even an earthquake.

But Mr. Dutch isn’t ready to pick just one answer. What he is ready for is for the questions to stop. When queried for the umpteenth time about the cause of the booms, Mr. Dutch curtly replied: “I’ve run out of ways to say I don’t know.”

Read more:

■  Dry weather causes strange noises in small town, KSFY, March 22, 2012.

■  Amanda Crum, Residents say loud “booms” accompanied quakes, WebProNews.com, March 23, 2012.

I Quit

“I quit on this date.”
Monty Collins, Former mayor of Alto, Texas

It’s true what they say: you can’t please all of the people all of the time. Sadly for the mayor of Alto, Texas (population 1,164), when it came to his city council, he couldn’t please any of the people any of the time.

Elected as mayor by a 2-to-1 margin last May, Monty Collins might be excused if he thought he had a mandate to make decisions in the best interest of his town. But the Alto city council saw things differently right from the get-go.

First, there was the decision by the city council to disband the entire police force in response to budget cuts, despite the strong objections of Mr. Collins. It was small consolation when, months later, the force was rehired.

Then, contrary to the wishes of the city council—and, as it turns out, state law—Mr. Collins leaked a document to the Texas Railroad Commission. In finger-wagging fashion, the council ordered the 78-year-old mayor to follow its orders and not to talk to the press or public.

In response, Mr. Collins did the only thing he could to please the city council. He didn’t say a word. He simply left a note that read: “I quit on this date.”

Read more → Joshua Rhett Miller, Mayor of Texas town resigns in 5-word note, FoxNews.com, March 21, 2012.

Darn Kid

“The goat was laying there, looking real innocent.”

Cheryl Stein, Owner of the Ravenna laundromat

Photo by Evelyn Simak (Creative Commons)

Thanks to a 15-pound goat, Ravenna, Michigan (population 1,206) is getting its 15 minutes of fame. And both the goat and the fame have residents scratching their heads in bewilderment.

The tale of the town and goat began when the goat escaped from the Ravenna livestock sale in early March. Try as they might, no one’s been able to catch the cagey critter.

It was a small town story until the goat, which would’ve fetched about $20 at the sale, caused $300 in damage head-butting a reflection of itself in the window of the local laundromat. Since then, the story’s gone viral. Reporters from as far away as Chicago and New York have called, and even Saturday Night Live gave the goat a mention.

But Jim Nutt, owner of the town’s bowling alley, says the goat is a nuisance, not a star. It poops in his parking lot and sleeps in his bushes. Darn kid.

Read more:

■  Heather Lynn Peters, Rogue pygmy goat wreaks havoc in Muskegon County's Ravenna Township, MLive.com, March 7, 2012.

■  Heather Lynn Peters, Ravenna Township residents baffled by pygmy goat notoriety, media attention, MLive.com, March 14, 2012.